When I'm mad, I'd either keep quite or worst, cry.
I knew someone 3 yrs back, in matrix, whom I didnt really like. And the hatred grows thicker when he's destined as my course mate in university. Malaysia is small overall isnt it?
Now, I'm in my final year, and once again, I just couldnt run from meeting such a painful truth when he shares the same supervisor as mine. So yeah, we have to work together, and the time spent with each other are getting longer.
Why did I hate him from the first place? Coz he used to say something I was very furious about. And apparently, the unfinished grudges spread through my veins that each time we meet, we quarrel. It is just cant be helped.
Lately, the atmosphere seems to be like a volcano eruption. We had tongue-tied every 2 mins or less as I'm easily enraged by him. Yes, I'm tired, fed-up and it takes too much efforts to control my anger. Unfortunately, they failed.
I cried. Not because I feel bad towards him, but it is more to self-respect and dignity. I've lost self-pride. Coz it is shameful enough as many have witnessed myself scold him in public, it is an uncontrollable madness, u can see fire through my eyes when I'm talking to him. Yes, of course I feel terrible after our altercation, like I said, my own kindle burns me. But I really dont know why this happens and how to stop it. This is an unsolved puzzle that puzzles me a whole heck of a lot.
Shafuraa Onn. 011210. 0238. Kolej Ungku Omar, UKM, Bangi.