Monday, December 7, 2009

time tells it all

I’m still learning to really understand myself- how I’d react to conditions and situations, how I’d manipulate things, how I’d define problems, causes and consequences…u know, stuff like that. The more I try, the more complicated a thing sometimes be. And most of the time, u just cant figure matters out when they popped in seconds. You would be wishing…if only I did that, if only it turned out to be slightly better, if only this and that. And all u need is time to get things down to the roots and it is when you really believe that u subjected to life. Not the other way round.

As for myself, several times I realised that I overanalysed things. A simple one would turn out messy, and a big one would become a headache. And to be worst, I always drive a matter to my pathway of negative thoughts. Until someone wakes me up. And most of the time too, I just need maybe 10 mins to get myself back to neutral, no more or less, having positive thinking back on track. There are like some arguments running inside of me, emotionally, physically and what not. And if that’s the way of me understanding myself, I couldn’t be more grateful. Coz if that’s what God has created for me, I know its for the best in me as His servant.

I cant successfully describe what type of person I am, though I’ve lived for already 2 decades now. Coz for the last couple of yrs, I was alarmed if I couldn’t stand a person for a long time. This never happens on best buddies (as for now) but occasionally, this happens on friends. Initially, everything is so damn good- we do things together, we laugh, we ride on bikes, we share stories and problems…we do things that friends would do together. But after some time, I’d find myself suffocated with him/her. Stuff that we enjoyed doing has become a boring one and what I’d do is to avoid that person. I’m pretty well aware that he/she isn’t at any fault, but I’m very much suffocated with everything. As far as I can remember, there’re 4 persons I feel guilty on. I just need some time off. That’s all. I wouldn’t call our friendship a day coz u guys have been so helpful to me. Really.

Maybe, I’m a type of God’s creature that needs challenges in relationships. Maybe I cant stand something that is alright all day long. I need ups and downs (but I prefer ups more frequent) getting to know someone so that I always have new chapter to learn about that particular person. I rarely can stand having no tongue-tied or quarrels in a relationship. Coz when everything seems ok from our naked eyes as we intended to hide real feelings of matters just to get along well with a person, we are actually lying to ourselves and sooner or later, a boredom would definitely strike.

I have always believed that doubting people is a part of trying to know them and trust is actually giving up on trying to understand other. That’s the reason why I don’t fully trust a person coz behind every lies and secrets, there’s always something to learn about, regardless of who’s wrong. It is the time when u add knowledge about yourself and others. It is when you define things in life. It is when you actually grow up upon time.

shafura onn

Awesome Aussie !

It has been nearly a month since Lala’s solemnization as well as wedding and couple of days since my trip to Sydney and Perth, Australia. Both were really fun and awesome and incredible! There’s no word that can really describe the entire situation of those two memorable events of the year for my family.

We took a flight from Singapore and headed to Perth. We arrived there at almost 1 in the morning and the shops in the airport were still closed (the shops will close and open as early as 5pm and 3am). But luckily they have free internet surfing there so I decided to check my emails as well as facebook. At about 5, we boarded to Sydney and the journey took about 4 hours. Can u imagine how big Australia is? Going from a state to another state by flight needs 4 hours. My math isn’t that good to calculate total hours needed for a whole country visit. :P

Though the holidays in aussie just took a few days, not even a week, but the experience is terrific! The Australians are very friendly (even the butcher says hi to me) and the weather is cold (tho now is summer) coz the wind blows way too strong. But its humidity is quite low (we had dry lips there). We found several halal restaurants as we stayed in Randwick . It is such a beautiful outstanding city where u can easily find eye-shoring beaches just near the walking roads.

The beaches are hardly describable. The water is so green and some of the beaches blue, and the sandy part which may be called intertidal zone of the sea is so great! There’s no rubbish or whatsoever lying on the sand or grass on land. U can hardly see even a plastic bag being swept away by the winds or waves. Not at all. Summer enables people in there to go surfing though the waves are pretty strong (now I believe what they show on tv and movies). We enjoyed looking at how they spend their time on sports. Even a pregnant woman goes swimming. Men would be shirtless regardless of whether they’re walking or cycling, and both genders prefer to be on ground bare-footed as many houses located nearby and they are extremely big, just like the sum of money needed to buy them. The houses can reach up to AU$ 6 MILL DOLLARS! (to convert to Malaysian ringgit, pls times 3.19)

And regardless of time, Australians do jog anywhere anytime they want. I once witnessed a woman jogging while pushing a stroller with a baby in it. I bet Gisele Bundchen would have green eyes looking at the woman’s body. Haha :P

Another thing that differs them from us is they prefer walking instead of to be on wheels. They even walk at night as if their country is very safe that they hardly find a pickpocket or beg-snatcher and thieves. U can see fearless faces of the people. And I didn’t get to see people drunk on streets. Maybe they just get drunk in bars. :P

We had our time shopping at Paddy’s market purchasing cheaper things compared to other stores. Therefore, there were sooo many people loitering around and u can easily get lost coz the place is very enormous. We also visited Sydney Wildlife World to see all types of aquatic animals ranging from sharks to crustaceans, and wildlife creatures like alligators, kangaroos and koalas (the koalas are very lazy and they enjoy sleeping on trees no matter how many people staring and teasing them). The place also provides the most dangerous species of spiders and snakes and these experiences are very useful to me as I’m a future biologist (Insyaallah) coz I get to see them with my naked eyes. How wonderful. :D

We went to Queen Victoria’s Building (shopping mall) as well as the streets nearby. We also marked our footsteps on The Rocks, Sydney Harbour and the landmark of Australia, a bridge called…(I forget the name of it). Haha :D

Australia is an awesome country and I’m very grateful to be able to witness other different creatures of Allah. But my love still goes to my first-greeted origin, Malaysia. It is true that people say “ there’s no place like home “. And I’m grateful too to be Malaysian. 

shafura onn